The Real Don Steele

The Real Don Steele would have been 74 on April 1st. You've probably heard me talk of him before. He's one of my idols (American or otherwise).He passed away on August 5, 1997. For thirty years The Real Don Steele ruled the Los Angeles airwaves, most notably on 93/KHJ “Boss Radio” in the 60’s and 70’s. Outrageous, electrifying, thrilling – that was Real on…and OFF the air. If you want to hear

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AMERICAN WHITEL

It was “Soul and R&B” week on “American Idol” as performed by the New Christy Minstrels. A high school girl from Middlebury, Connecticut taking on Aretha; another high schooler getting down with Bill Withers. I’m surprised the celebrity mentor wasn’t R&B legend, Kristin Chenoweth.The mentor they did use, Usher, gave some really good advice – when he wasn’t staring at the kids in disbelief. The

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The worst, most appalling attempt at a joke EVER

A local anchor on WMUR in New Hampshire said this on a recent newscast: “A Democratic State Representative from Manchester is under fire for posting a comment on Facebook that could be deemed as insensitive towards the Japanese heritage.”Rep. Nick Levasseur posted: "Anime is a prime example of why two nukes just wasn't enough," on Facebook.”Uh, COULD be deemed as insensitive? You mean if

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David Mamet's brilliant memo on drama

I discovered this extraordinary memo from David Mamet to the writers of THE UNIT, a series he created a few semesters back for CBS. (The origination of the memo seems to have come from Ink Canada. I discovered it through Movie Line.)It is a simply brilliant essay on drama and writing in general. In fact, it’s pretty much all you need to know about writing drama. Excuse that it’s written in

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Who needs France when you have Las Vegas?

This was my travelogue from a few years ago when a bunch of us idiots went to Vegas for the first week of March Madness. I highly recommend it -- the experience not the travelogue. March Madness has arrived again -- the NCAA basketball tournament. Thus the annual pilgrimage to Las Vegas for me and three of my middle aged sports nerd television executive buddies. Slater, the Banger, and Mr.

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My objective take on Sandra Bullock and her scumbag husband

At least she won her Oscar. Jesus, poor Sandra Bullock. Almost before she finished her acceptance speech word came out that her husband Jesse James was having an affair. And then by the Governor’s Ball it turned into two affairs. By the time she gave back the borrowed gown and jewelry that number had risen to three. Now it’s four and by the time Sandra is a presenter at next year’s

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24 is cancelled

Fox says the show is too expensive to make. I for one am going to miss it. Yes, it’s implausible, they’ve gone through every villain except Glenn Beck, and can get anywhere in Manhattan and Los Angeles in only ten minutes. But it was also rollicking fun. And I marvel at how they can keep the suspense up hour after hour. Plus, they always seem to come up with new twists. I’m sure this

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Will there be a CHEERS reunion?

For you new readers: every Friday I answer your questions. And if I don't know the answers I'll either seek out someone who does or just make something up. Leave yours in the comments section. Thanks. One thing I ask: please use a name. Don't be Anonymous. Anonymous wonders:Hey Ken, have you heard anything about the Cheers reunion rumors?I hadn’t heard but I can say this – not a chance.

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Oh no! MTV has cancelled THE HILLS

Say it ain't so! You mean I won’t be able to watch the vainest most narcissistic pretty people Los Angeles eating at sidewalk cafes anymore?“I think we’ve told the story of struggle and of finding yourself in L.A.,” creator Adam DiVello said to Entertainment Weekly. Boy, I’ll say. The heartbreak of someone not quickly returning your text message. The agony of cloudy days when you want to

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the Ken Levine celebrity autograph and nostalgia show

Last month there was an autograph and nostalgia show in Burbank. They hold these every few months. Fans can get autographs and signatures with former stars and celebrities. They ranged from Jane Russell to the cast of the TERMINATOR (minus the governor of California). There are always a lot of former child stars and the guy who played Mini Me in AUSTIN POWERS. Also former BAYWATCH babes who

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AMERICAN IDOL: Top 11

When it comes to truly great vocal teachers, there are really only two masters – Barbara Cook and Miley Cyrus. One has 80 years of life experience and is an expert in song interpretation; the other can pole dance. So it was a real coup for "American Idol" to get Miley Cyrus to be the celebrity mentor this week and share the wisdom of her 17 years.Sadly, the fact that the Top 11 contestants

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Should you attend your high school reunion?

A lot of people I know have been invited recently to their various high school reunions. They all wonder whether they should go. And if the hair plugs will look natural in the next two months. It’s a hard question to answer, whether to go. I guess you have to ask yourself – how much do you want to see these people again? There’s always a risk. That cheerleader who snubbed you might not

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Women: Do not shave and drive

Back from a whirlwind trip to New York to speak on a panel at the Talkers convention, a symposium for talk radio sponsored by Talkers magazine and Michael Harrison. I accepted the invitation immediately and was thrilled to learn my panel was not “Talk radio frauds”. It was great fun and I got to hang with my two BFF’S – Stephanie Miller and G. Gordon Liddy.This is one of the few traditional

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What is the best way to write a pilot?

Here's a question I'm often asked: What is the best way to write a pilot? I can’t speak for dramatic pilots since I’ve never written one but here are some thoughts from the trenches on comedy.First off, there is no easy answer. But here are some pointers:Make the premise simple – something you can pitch in one or two sentences. If you have to say“it’s about two brothers who were separated at

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Better than any AMERICAN IDOL open audtion...

From a Carnival Cruise "talent" show. It really gets good around 1:20 in. Man the lifeboats!!

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Help! I'm stuck on a bad show!

Off for a quick two-day trip to Gotham to speak at the Talkers radio convention. Meanwhile, here are some Friday Q’s for yous.From SimoSSimonhammon:We all know that you've had the good fortune to work on quite a few classic sitcoms, but I'm sure you've probably done or have known other talented writers who have worked on shows that didn't work. How, as a writer who knows they're good at their

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Me & Tom Brokaw

Here's another snippet from the memoir I'm writing about growing up in the 60s. It's 1968. I'm a student at UCLA spending most of my time at the campus radio station, KLA.In November, KLA utilized all its resources to cover election night. They sent people out to the various campaign headquarters. That was the sum total of their resources. I was assigned to the Biltmore Hotel downtown where

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AMERICAN IDOL: Top 2 + 10

“American Idol” is like the Academy Awards this year – a plethora of nominees but only two real contenders. It’s Siobhan Magnus vs. Crystal Bowersox. (Why does my spellcheck flag me for “Bowersox” but think that “Siobhan” is a real word?) The rest are just fish chum. I’d be happy if Crystal wins but I LOVE Siobhan. She’s got an amazing voice, a real sense of theater, and let’s just say it

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Ron Lundy 1934-2010

He wasn’t particularly funny on the air. He was certainly not what you’d call “hip”. I can’t imagine him dropping acid with Mick Jagger or Janis Joplin. But he was always one of my favorite D.J.’s. Ron Lundy passed away.For most of the 60s and 70s he was the midday man on 77WABC in New York. From there he spent a couple of decades handling that same shift on Stereo 101 WCBS-FM in New

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The 119 words you can't say on radio

Randy Michaels is the CEO of the Tribune Company. Once a major broadcasting and publishing giant (Chicago Tribune, LA Times, etc.), it is now crumbling like a sand castle. And Michaels, who in a similar role with Clear Channel Communication, laid the groundwork for that empire to collapse. So it’s understandable why Tribune would hire a non-newspaper man to oversee their operation in it's

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Reporting from the Cactus League

Back from a short trip to Phoenix to perform some Dodger duties. Having covered spring training in both Arizona and Florida I greatly prefer the “Valley of the Radio Shack on every corner”. More teams in closer proximity. You can spend your vacation going to ballgames not driving hundreds of miles just to see some split squad game or getting lost in “Deliverance” country.And the fact that it

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Really rotten ritin'

I don't know how legit these are but who cares? They're really funny.Every year, English teachers from across the country can submit their collections of actual similes and metaphors found in high school essays. These excerpts are published each year to the amusementof teachers across the country. Here are last year's winners: 1. Her face was a perfect oval, like a circle that had its two sides

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If you thought the Jay Leno Show was a bomb

In 1961 CBS premiered a prime time game show called YOU'RE IN THE PICTURE starring Jackie Gleason. It was not well received. The show next week was unprecedented. Host Jackie Gleason just sat in a chair and... well, you'll have to see for yourself. Jackie Gleason : "You're in the Picture"Uploaded by werquin. - Discover more animation and arts videos.

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What do producers actually do?

Here are more Friday questions answered. From rockfish:Being in both writing and sports, do you know why sports has rarely translated into a successfully popular TV show?TV tends to shy away from sports-themed shows because they can be way expensive. At some point you need to see the games and that requires crowds, a lot of production, and MONEY. There have been some attempts but they tend to

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My favorite Peri Gilpin story

Last week there was some grumbling that I didn't answer enough Friday questions. So this week I'm devoting two days to your questions. More answered manana. Jeff gets it started.We are big Frasier fans, but we just watch whatever show comes on cable. I never read about Roz - although we like her character a lot. Any stories there?First off, Peri

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Ru Paul's Drag Race

So let's switch gears from yesterday and baseball.Spanning the dial to bring you the cheesiest in reality shows, I have uncovered a gem. Many thanks to my daughter Annie for turning me onto this little beauty. RU PAUL’S DRAG RACE on Logo. Logo is the gay network although I think this show is even too gay for them.RU PAUL'S DRAG RACE follows your standard reality competition format with

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Join me on MLBN for Dodger baseball

Hello from Phoenix where I’m covering spring training and doing my Dodger Talk shows on 790 KABC.On Wednesday I’m calling the play-by-play for the Dodgers-Diamondbacks game on Prime Ticket in Los Angeles, and on MLBN nationwide if you get that cable channel. Game time: noon pacific. I’ll be doing it with Steve “Psycho” Lyons. So set your DVR or better yet, call in sick at work.Spring

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The 2010 Academy Awards

The Oscars were very elegant this year all the way up to the opening number. Then Neil Patrick Harris sang about sodomy, masturbation, and prison and Hollywood’s classiest night was underway! But the hosts were good, there was some genuine suspense for a change, and if you could make it all the way till the end, a very satisfying ending.People are saying “Hurt Locker” was an upset. No. “A

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Why I review the Oscars

Because Hollywood takes itself waaaaaay too seriously.When winners use clichés like “journey” and “artist” they MEAN IT. When they call a director who helmed AMERICAN PIE 10 a “visionary” they really think he is.When Oscar attendees wear ribbons supporting the cause de jour they seriously believe they’re doing their part…just by wearing the ribbons. That’s not true in all cases. A few, like

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Is Tiger Woods a sexoholic? Yes, dear.

We may have all been fooled by Tiger Woods' recent scandal but the writers of YES, DEAR weren't. This is from several years ago.

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Dark Haired White Women of Westminster

From one of the funniest people I know, Merrill Markoe:

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Why did we leave MASH?

Today’s Friday question is one I get frequently (usually from my agent). bevo asks:How come you left MASH?We had just completed the 7th season. From the time David Isaacs and I became head writers we pretty much wrote or re-wrote every script. We had a very small staff.Most of the stories came from the research that we, and before us, Gene Reynolds and Larry Gelbart conducted with doctors,

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Here's a great newsroom fight

Get Mary Richards to break it up.

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Mo'Nique Talks About Her Open Marriage, Hairy Legs

Some stray thoughts and possible amusements: Not what you want to hear: A police helicopter was sweeping my street last night and over a loudspeaker I heard: “Put down your weapon! Put down your weapon!” Note to neighbors: You might want to have your daughters sell those Girl Scout cookies tomorrow or the next night.If they’re still looking for the plot of HANGOVER 2 I’ve got one for you.

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AMERICAN IDOL: Girls will be Boys

AMERICAN IDOL pulled a last minute switch, having the boys sing last night and the girls tonight instead of the other way around. This is due to contestant, Crystal Bowersox – the hippie chick – being taken to the hospital for an undisclosed ailment. Hopefully she’s okay to perform this evening. And even if she’s not who’s going to vote off someone rushed to the hospital? Last year’s

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For cheating spouses, politicians, members of the clergy, and professional ballplayer – this is for YOU!

Those fine folks at Apple are now offering an app that causes your text messages to disappear. If Tiger Woods had this last year he’d still be married and shaving with Gillette. Ironically, the app is called TigerText. It allows users to set a time limit on how long their text messages remain. This can be anywhere from days to sixty seconds.Wow! It’s like MISSION IMPOSSIBLE except with

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